The suffocating emptiness

...how many more pills

until I find myself dead?

Sofia Velasquez Mejia

I feel it, sometimes it comes unnoticed, in the silence or in the noisiness,

Oh Lord, I feel it coming, hide me from my thoughts before they eat me alive and there’s nothing

left but an empty soul with a gloomy side

I can feel it, that stubborn emptiness that doesn’t let me rest at all, or that makes me fall into a

deep sleep knocking me out,

8, 10, 12, 14 hours, it doesn’t care at all, it just wants me to be numb

giving way to feelings and emotions that take me away from my peace of mind and steal my

calm,

What else should I do?

These pills aren’t working and I’m tired of trying

Trying of feeling better, feeling suffocated, shaking, trembling as my sight goes dark and

suddenly, I think I’m back… oh wait, it was just an anxiety attack

One to clear my mind, two to breathe again, three to ease the pain, but… how many more pills

until I find myself dead?

I swear to God this emptiness threat me to swallow me whole, making me feel worthless and sad,

putting nightmares into my dreams and I just can tell myself to breathe.

Just breathe…

»Mano humana» de Anaeli A. Ortiz García
La.Corcheta
La.Corcheta
Articles: 177